So I have so much to write, yet I cannot seem to clearly and eloquently express what HE has been teaching me and showing me these past two weeks. I am beginning to think that this blogging thing is not my forte but HE has placed it on my "To Do List" for today...so I am apologizing now if it does not make sense and asking the Spirit to translate to each of you what HE had intended for your day today!


My overwhelming theme for the past two weeks is just how small and insignificant that I am. I think that I do a great job of convincing myself that I matter and have some sort of say in this day of mine and in this city/world I live in. And this week, I have been reminded of just Who it is that I serve and was created by and for what purpose. I can think that what I did today was all because of my preparations, planning, and prayers but HE has shown me that I need to stop thinking in my flesh and just continue listening to His Voice.


So just to help you understand how He has been teaching me this theme of my smallness, you first need to know what I have been reading, listening to, and doing. It all starts with the book of Romans...need I say more? I mean whenever you are feeling a little too full of yourself, just head on over and receive the smack down from Paul and realize just the sinner you are. Follow that with The Truth Project study I have been doing with Ruth each week. The truths HE has been showing me through this study have not only knocked me to my knees but also have started a process of re-examining every one of my thoughts, actions, and way we live. So if The Truth Project in english wasn't enough, HE provided a copy of it in Spanish which I have started with my youth. Can we say double whammy? Follow that by a blessing from Faith and her friends...the book "Radical" and the Louie sermon series. If you have never heard David Platt's sermon series or read this book, I seriously challenge you to stop reading my non-sense and start it today. (Except if you are part of my family because you never know what Santa had planned for your surprises this year!!) So at this point I am no longer on my knees, but face down on the floor weeping, repenting, praising, thinking about what HE part of the world have I allowed to taint My Saviour. And why not end it all with a great big bang, watch two of Louie's sermons on How Great is Our Dad and Indescribable. Who am I after trying to locate myself on a golf ball that sits on top of Everest? (If you haven't seen these sermons, then you have no idea what I am talking about...sorry about that!)


Add all of that to thoughts and searching His Words about ways to share Him and His stories with these people. What HE wants for me and how do I do what HE is showing me when I have been told that I cannot? And doing all of this I just rest in HIM knowing that HE is the BIG star breathing Father who does whatever HE wants to for His glory and I get to watch it all! This same Creator would call a girl back to Colombia, cancel all that was planned to do for two days, make it impossible to do anything else besides sit in His lap, and called her to HIM just to rest!


In our smallness and insignificance, Our Dad still sees us, hears us, and wants to spend time with us. After all the days, months, and  years that we have spent taking His Words and molding them into what fits our idea of what it means to serve Him...He still chooses to stop everything, close every door around you, and wait with arms wide open just to love on you and show Himself to you!


How do you put all of that into words? How can you begin to wrap your little pee-brain around All That Is, All That Was, and All That Will Ever Be? PRAISE YOU, DAD! Be gloried through my ramblings today and speak to your children now! I am so in love with YOU!!

So you have amazing plans for an incredibly productive week and you are so excited about this week! Your first day passes and nothing goes the way you planned it but no worries...you have the rest of the week just a little reorganization here and movement there and tada...you are back in business! So the second day comes and goes, at the end of the day you look at your check list and think seriously Tuesday is gone? How? Day after day brings the same thing, lots of things that prevent you from doing what you had planned.

Last week I had the opportunity to spend 4 days on a reservation/ranch of an indigenous tribe here in Colombia...more to come on that later. As I was preparing for this trip, I felt so inadequate to teach, overwhelmed by the lack of my spanish, and just unsure of why He chose for me to go.

He speaks so clearly through His Word and spoke to me through Isaiah when He told me that He will put His Words in my mouth and that His righteousness has gone before me and His glory will be my rear guard. What else is there to do when The Almighty tells you these things? Just rest in His Arms, sit, and listen to what He wants to tell you!

And so I did just that. Of course, Jota and I prepared for this weekend and knew HE guided us as we were completely on the same page with each lesson. Of course the enemy stuck his head in and made me feel like I was having difficulties communicating with Jota my ideas and understanding his ideas (something that rarely happens). I began to get nervous as here I am an english speaker teaching in my second language to a group of indigenous youth who will be listening in their second language or translating into their language for the group. And again He met me with His Words, I will put MY WORDS in your mouth, Kendall...rest in me!

This was lesson number one for me. Have you been wrestling with these thoughts as well? Thoughts of inadequacy, frustration, guilt because of past sin, and just unsure of why you? Rest in His Words that He has gone before you, will give you HIS WORDS, and will be your rear guard! Remember His focus is to bring Himself glory, it will happen with or without us! I don't know about you but I love watching HIM work and don't want to miss a thing!! So I am resting in HIM and watching HIM work!

Lesson number two: Devotion, True Adoration, True Love, Passion, Compassion, and the First Club in Acts...all of these things were questioned as I watched and was loved on by a group of people who have been completely run over and mistreated by everyone. I saw what each of these looked like in real life and in Light of His Truth! It was truly a blessing and I am not sure I have the words today to describe what HE taught me and what I am still processing through.

These people came from all over on their bikes, riding 2-5 hours each way to come and hear His Truth, and carrying at least 2 people with them! They came with what little they had to this reservation/ranch and all of their love, devotion, adoration, and passion for HIM and HIS Words! When they arrived they were welcomed in, given food, a place to stay, clothes, and lots of love! 

They included me in this group, although I brought my own clothes, they wanted to share theirs and their culture with me. Acts of selfishness were as normal to them as brushing our teeth is to us. You know when Paul describes the New Testament Clubs? Well, this group of people not only read his words but believed that they were THE ONLY WAY and put them into practice!

What would that look like in our society, if new believers would read HIS WORDS and accept them as THE ONLY WAY and immediately put them into practice? What would your club look like? What would your day to day activities look like?

And these people are doing this all with the internal struggle/battle of finding their identities as believers and as indigenous tribe. It is a difficult battle as they do not want to loose who they are as indigenous but don't want to miss any aspect of their new lives as believers. 

I listened to stories of young women who had been sold, by their fathers, for 20 goats and 4 necklaces to a man twice their age who beats her and lets all of his friends do whatever they want with her. Looking for her identity and value in HIM and trying to honor her father and her culture at the same time. Difficult is hardly the word that justly describes where these young women are and what they are dealing with! Yet those words above that I was challenged with by the Father, I saw in this young woman! And she sits and asks me for help/pryr/advice! Who am I? Little does she know that I am learning so much from her but I remember what HE told me before I left...HE was here before, HE put HIS WORDS in my mouth, and HE will be here to finish what HE started!

Yeah, not sure if any of this makes sense to you as you are reading this blog. I am still processing through a lot of things HE showed me this past weekend. I will post more once I have processed it all! Until then, please be pryng for these beautiful people in the Guajira as they take the strategies that we taught them and begin to implement them in their lives, lives of other members of their tribe, and other tribes!